From Soup to Putz

Squawker Lisa, I see you've named the new Yankee pitchers Alphabet Soup because they are CC and A.J. But the Mets also introduced a new pitcher Thursday, J.J. Putz., so you can't have Alphabet Soup all to yourself. Instead, how about these soup-related nicknames for your new pitchers: Chicken Soup for the always-ailing Burnett and Souper-Size for Sabathia.

And here's a nickname for Yankee fans after they shell out for tickets to the new Yankee Stadium: Soup Kitchen.

I also had some suggestions for numbers for the new Yanks, if only these numbers were not retired. Sabathia could have worn 3 for the number of years after which he can opt out of his contract. Also, his body type is similar to the Babe's. Burnett could have worn 10, for the number of times he has been on the disabled list.

And Lisa, I'm just fine with calling Francisco Rodriguez K-Rod instead of F-Rod. After all, Dwight Gooden wasn't called Dr. G. (That would have sounded like a weatherman or a dermatologist in subway ads.)

As for Sabathia saying he got chills when telling his real estate agent that he is a Yankee, I suspect it was really the other way around!

Only the Yankees could take the two biggest signings of the free-agent season in terms of contract size and combine them into one news conference. What, they didn't want to spring for a second carving board? Even the Mets had two separate welcomes for K-Rod and Putz.

If Putz sticks with number 40 (there was a report that he might try to get 20 from Howard Johnson), that number could have a couple of meanings. 40 is the number of saves Putz had in 2007, the year he made the All-Star team. And 40 is the number of games the Mariners were under .500 in 2008, when they went 61-101, and why I believe him when he says he's happy to be a setup man for a contender.

Finally, Lisa, thanks for ruining my night by letting me know that mlb.com's "Moment of the Year" was Derek Jeter's speech after the last game played at the old Yankee Stadium.

Look, even I think it was a special day, but did the 2008 Yankees really need to take a victory lap around the Stadium? After all, it was the last game only because they were missing the playoffs after 13 straight appearances.

I suppose we shouldn't take this list all that seriously, considering that second place went to something that happened in the Home Run Derby. But as long as the voters don't seem interested in things that actually happened during a game, goodness gracious, where's Roger Clemens testifying before Congress?